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Wine needs an environment that recognizes the fact that it’s a living, breathing liquid. The absolute ultimate storage would keep wines at 55⁰, with at least 75% humidity, protected from ultraviolet rays and vibration. All that means, of course, an actual wine cellar. A wide variety of units is available at prices ranging from what you and I would call reasonable to what Bill Gates would call reasonable. Plan B would be to store your wine in the refrigerator. Not the most ideal location, but way, way better than the third alternative, the dreaded Arizona room temperature. That’s 70-80 degrees, folks, and if you keep your wine at that temperature in two months you can add a little olive oil and toss a mean salad. Okay, I know what you’re thinking. “What about those cute racks Aunt Millie gave me?” Use them to display empty “good memory” bottles!

The two elements of service most often discussed are temperature and “breathing”. If you’re using Plan B for storage remember that while most whites can be consumed straight from the fridge, one with any complexity will benefit from a little de-chilling so your tongue tastes the wine, not just the cold. When it comes to reds, if time allows remove them from the fridge at least half an hour before serving. A favorite concept, that reds are best at room temperature, was definitely not developed in Arizona (70-80 degrees, remember?)

The breathing ritual is reserved for reds. Exposing a young red to air softens the tannins and allows the intended flavors to emerge. To air it out, pour the wine aggressively into a decanter or flower vase just before serving.

If you’re serving an older red, you should choose decanting. Stand the bottle up for 12 hours, then pour the wine slowly into a decanter, without stopping. This separates the bitter sediments from the “good stuff”. If you’re still thirsty, you can strain the sediment through a coffee filter. At this point, you probably wouldn’t taste the difference anyway!

We’ve all seen the glossy magazine photos of the Beautiful People gathered around a table so laden with crystal it should by all rights collapse. This not only makes it a dangerous mission to reach for the butter, it’s really unnecessary. The idea that you can not serve red wine in a white wine glass was probably perpetrated by the crystal companies in cahoots with the wine geeks of the world, who are always looking for ways to make wine scarier and less accessible. Of course there’s logic behind the concept. The wider mouths of red wine glasses facilitate the breathing process. Champagne is all about the bubbles that tickle your nose, and flutes concentrate that sensation. But the bottom line is, a bad wine will taste bad in Baccarat, and a good wine will taste good in a Dixie cup. So, unless you’re entertaining foreign dignitaries, use what you have!

Shopping

Your best bet is a good, friendly wine store. While you can buy many decent to good wines in the supermarket now, you’re not going to get much direction or advice at most of them, and the storage conditions might rival Auntie’s wine rack. Wine stores know what they’re doing, they’re happy to share that knowledge, and they can get their hands on the stuff you read about in the magazines.

The increased interest in wines in the last decade has had a totally positive influence on the restaurant experience. Stiff, snobby sommeliers are out, as are stiff, snobby wine lists. Great wines by the glass are now available in abundance. When you’re in a restaurant with a good reputation, don’t hesitate to ask questions and seek recommendations from the server/manager/owner/(dishwasher). (Important Note: If, instead of asking caring, relevant questions such as “what do you normally drink?", "what is the occasion?" and "what foods did you order?" they immediately recommend an expensive wine on special from Botswana... Run!!!)

There’s nothing as entertaining as bringing together people who love food and wine. Don’t stress over what to offer. Use the experts I’ve already mentioned to help. Most wine stores and restaurants will be glad to help you match wines to your menu. Try not to call a restaurant at 7PM on a weekend...it’s not fair and you won’t get the attention they really would like to give you.

The original intent of wine was to be delicious. Somewhere along the line, wine got saddled with Rules. Rules on chilling, breathing, storing, pouring, ordering---it’s enough to make you opt for a cold beer. (Pop top. Consume. Whew! That was easy!) So keep in mind that wine is still delicious. And that it is just grown-up grape juice. Go ahead, break the rules, except for the ones that really matter. (Sorry, I’m not budgin’ on Auntie’s wine racks.)